littler bit of my story
Clue: The Other Side
By CJ Roy
Narrator- Hello this is Clue, today a few people are playing a game, or is it? A game that is. In this “play” you will see the other side of the story, the way the game pieces see it, on the this episode of Twilight Zone! Nah, I’m just kidding yah, this show doesn’t have enough money in its budget to afford that shows cool special effects, and kick ass music… oh yeah, its bad ass all right. Back to what I was saying, before, we cant even use the name “Twilight Zone” or so that what my manager tells me.
Stage Manager- (walks on) Actually you just said it twice….
Narrator- So that means?
Stage Manager- Just be careful because if you say Twiligh… if we say the word one more time then we have to pay money out are ass for the use of the name.
Narrator- Just so were clear, the word that you say carefully avoided is…
Stage Manager- (cuts him off) Don’t you dare
Narrator- Hey it's rude to interrupt, Twilight…
Stage Manager- (cuts him off) Your not going to are you?
Narrator- Zone
Stage Manager- (visibly mad) Oh my god, do you know how much that’s going to cost us?
Narrator- What? Twilight Zone?
Stage Manager- (Rage building) God dam it man stop saying Twilight Zone, God dam it, you even made me say you… idiot! Do you even know how much it costs to use that name?
Narrator- Twilight Zone? I don’t understand, there just words man, they don’t cost a thing, see that’s the beauty of language its free ninety nine, well I mean without the ninety nine of course, is just a joke, well maybe if we were nazis it would cost us.
Stage Manager- (writes something down on clip board) This is how much it cost!
Narrator- Wait before you show me; take away all the zeros first ok? (Sees number) One dollar! Why didn’t you say anything man, that’s my whole paycheck! Is it in Canadian money too? Say its isn’t so! Man this is weird; it’s like an episode of Twilight Zone or something.
Stage Manager- Urge to kill rising…
Narrator- What’s that you say, are you still talking about Twilight Zone, I thought we were past that? Man you just cant let things go, can you?
Stage Manager- (waves hand)
Narrator- What’s that your motioning for? Man if I didn’t know any better I’d say your still mad about me saying Twilight Zone, but I know your bigger than that, you wouldn’t let a simple thing like that come between us would you, I mean we work together, I’m even dating your hot sister, (babbles on)
Killer- (runs in and knifes narrator)
Stage Manager- I tried to warn you! Dam it! (Turns to killer) Thank you!
Killer- (waves and walks away)
Stage Manager/Narrator #2- So anyways, looks like I’m the new narrator, not that I’m complaining or anything. Uhhhh what to say, confusion so high right now, ummmmm…. Well the guy in the mask was the killer, you will be seeing a lot of him, unless your blind, (slaps leg)(mumbles under his breath) that’s not funny, anyways lets not waste anymore of your time with this inner play politics, so yah… on to the show it is.
Scene 1
(Lights come up and cast is standing around Colonel Mustard)
Yvet- Shockay vous- Misouer is le dead?
Cook- Yeah we can all see le that. Thanks Captain Obvious.
Scarlet- Well at least he wasn’t the first one to go.
Cook- What? Who else died, everyone is here (Killer creeps on) including the killer, (killer freezes) who is standing among us as I speak! (Dramatic pause) Is it you Scarlet? Proffesor Plumb? Mister Peacock?
MP- It's misses now
Cook- Right you got that “Hair cut” last Thursday. Mister Green, or the Butler?
Butler- (visibly agitated) Why did you say my name last? Do you suspect me of doing something?
Cook- Why are you so nervous then? Hmmm? Only the killer would have something to hide!
Butler- I am just as likely to have killed him as you! He was a bastard to all of us! Its right he went first… second.
Cook- What do you mean second, only the killer would know about previous deaths, while were still trying to piece it together.
Butler- Well the narrator did go first?
Cook- A narrator? Like the guy the does all the voice-overs in the Twilight Zone?
Narrator- (off stage) GOD DAM IT
(All characters look to the voice then return as if nothing happened)
PP- Exnay on the Wiligtzonay!
Random- You must be the one with the lisp then, he means twilight zone.
(Black out)(Lights come back on)(Everyone is starring off stage in opposite direction of guy dieing)
Narrator #2- (Bashing in Random) (slowly drags him off stage)
Killer-(Pats him on the back, offers to help drag the body)
Narrator #2- (Yelling) NO, NO, I DON’T NEED ANY HELP DRAGGING THIS LIMP DEAD COLD BODY THAT I JUST BEAT TO DEATH INFRONT OF EVREYONE WITH THS LEAD PIPE! AND IF ANY ONE OF THEM TURNED AROUND RIGHT NOW THEY WOULD CATCH ME IN THE ACT AND THIS WHOLE PLAY WOULD BE FOR NOT! IN FACT I SHOULD STOP YELLING RIGHT NOW SO THAT I CAN CONTINUE TO DRAG THIS BODY EFFICIENTLY SO THAT KNOW ONE WILL CATCH ME… NO ONE… TURN AROUND… DEAD BODY… I KILLED IT… ME… THE NARRATOR… NUMBER TWO, WHO JUST KILLED A MAN IN COLD, BLOOD, JUST FOR SAYING TWILIGHT ZONE!
Killer- (knifes Narrator #2)
Narrator #2- OH GOD, NOW YOUR KILLING ME, OH THE SWEET IRONY, YOUR KILLING ME JUST AFTER I KILLED ANOTHER MAN FOR SAYING THE SAME NAME THAT I JUST SAID. ONLY IF ONE PERSON WOULD TURN AROUND, WHICH IS ALSO IRONIC BECAUSE AS I WAS YELLING BEFORE THEY DIDN’T TURN AROUND TO SAVE THEIR FRIEND’S LIFE, AND NOW THEY COULD SAVE MINE, WHO JUST KILLED THEIR FRIEND, WHICH ALMOST SEEMS LIKE JUSTICE, THERE REALLY IS A GOD. (Getting pulled out of view now) WAIT IS THAT A WOOD CHIPPER? NOW THEY WILL NEVER KNOW WHO ACTUALLY KILLED THEIR FRIEND, SINCE YOU ARE DISPOSING OF MY STILL LIVE BODY, AND NOW YOUR GOING TO TAKE CREDIT FOR BOTH THE MURDERS, OH YOUR CUNNING, YOU’RE A CUNNING MURDERER WHO IS KILLING ME WHO JUST KILLED THEIR FRIEND FOR SAYING TWILIGHT ZONE. OH GOD I SAID IT AGAIN, I DESERVE TO DIE IN THIS IRONIC WAY!
MP- anyone else tired of gazing for no reason at this clock?
But- No, but I think we should be more attentive of our surroundings considering there is a killer on the loose and all
MG- Right then lets turn around then and stop talking ABOUT turning around
(They turn around)
Scar- Gasp! The person who we never named is missing!
PP- I don’t have a lispbshe do I?
Cook- (Ignoring PP) Does anyone here a the sound of a high powered wood chipper, mixed in with the sharp sounds of bones crunching, mingled with blood splattering with someone screaming in horrendous pain for their life?
PP- No, why do you hear any of that?
Cook- Not really, I was just trying to start up a conversation.
MP- Lets stop fooling around here and get to some more serious business, its quite clear that we are all players from the game Clue, thus we must play the game. We have a death, now we must solve it using clues, that help our players (points to the sky) figure out who did the killing.
But- We should stick together as a group, the killer wont be able to pick us off if we are a large group
Yvet- But la what about le just now?
But- I have an overwhelming suspicion that wasn’t the work of the killer, the Killer seems like he would have been quieter.
MG- All right then lets split into groups of two and search out for the killer and his clues.
But- Are you mad? Have you never seen a horror movie? They always break up into groups and DIE! We need to stick together and LIVE!
PP- Well if this was a horror movie then we would have heard a loud noise as the Killer fed a person through a wood chipper or something kind of like that. Besides the minority always goes first in a horror movie, and its safe to say that Colonel Mustard wasn’t one.
Yvet- But I am le a minority (Starts to cry)
Cook- There you go upsetting the token French maid!
Killer- (Comforts Yvette)
Cook- You always have to say stupid yet logical things like that don’t you?
Scar- I am tired of listening to you guys argue I am leaving. Mister Green, you’re coming with me.
Cook- fine then, I am taking Mister Peacock, I mean Misses.
Killer- (Backs away)
PP- And I will take Yvette.
But- Wait, then whom do I get to go with? I am all alone?
Scar- (Nods head in Mustards direction) He was your partner.
Butt- But he’s dead. DEAD!
MP- Well I think we will head off after that trail of blood, looks to be some clues over there! (exit)
MG- Right, the victim was killed with a knife, so I think we will check in the kitchen first, maybe that’s where the killer got their weapon. Wait… the kitchen… The Cook after them!
(Everyone chases after)
But- (Picks up body) I guess its just me and you now eh Mustard? I’m sorry for calling you a bastard earlier I was visibly agitated. (Yeah were in this one together).